Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Training at STC has finally ended...my love hate relationship...heh...but i am actually dreading the fact that i am going to start flying solo..no buddy to accompany in the hotel room and no one to go sight-seeing with me...unless i pluck up some courage to ask the senior crew to go out with me...anyway we had our graduation on the 27th october...there was some technical glitch...but all went well...esp the catering..which was very well done...very yummilicious esp the Chocolate Fondue fountain...literally a fountain...yums yums...
Geri.Josh.Perks.Cillia.Chris
The Grand Finale!!!! photo taking with the management
the 12 pretty girls of BATCH 879, while sofian does his reenactment on that fateful day...
the walk around the mock-up was boring...so we decided to photo-whore and monkey around...heh *i came to a realisation that i got huge mouth....*
post grad dinner at Esmiralda with the rest...
going going gone 5:33 PM;
Monday, October 30, 2006
here goes the FUN FUN FUN halloween pictures taken at ZOUK!!.everyone is just soo enthu abt it...!!!!
going going gone 9:26 PM;
Sunday, October 29, 2006
my nagoya trip...shopping in Daiso is sooo fun....hahah...
spent all my time in the Intercontinental hotel ...didn't even step out of the hotel...hahaa...so Jasmine and i had a sumptous buffet and a photo whoring session!!!!
going going gone 11:32 PM;
anyway today i went for Zouk's Halloween party...it's my first time at a halloween party and i was so totally amused by all the party goers...they were awesome!so many funny and weird looking creatures around.. i shall post up all these pictures soon...
anyway this afternoon i was woken up by jeremy and he asked me to accompany him to get a halloween costume..heh...so off we went to Aliwal St (No. 1 Costume Cosutme) ...it's such a cool place..it was better than Housz of Costumez at Peace Centre..it's probably like 6 times bigger !!! and they have soo much more variety!but oh well i am pleased with my female version of peter pan at Housz of Costumez...Jeremy managed to get a monster mask and a cape and his friend Zack got a cape too with a "Scream" mask...cool...soo nice..Jeremy is such a funny guy...he is always using the words like "BESTEST" and "WORLD's BEST"..kinda amuses me all the time...cos for a man his age..and using words like that..are so unlike him...hhahaa...well...but it's really nice hanging out with people like that...makes u feel very happy all the time...
really hoping to see my pictures for the Halloween soon...cos i took tons of pics with other characters...heh...=)))) hope to upload them and blog abt them...hehh....think i shld stop typing and go to sleep now... cos it's alreasy 6:22am !!!!!!!!! freak....hahaa.....
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sometimes you see yourself very differently from what others view you asyou constantly try to fit yourself into the mould that the society wants you to besometimes you just try too hard, you hurt yourselfwhy should you be bothered by how others view you?maybe it doesn't matter at all...and if it does..how much does it worth?but sometimes it is quite nice to find out what others think about you...even if you're probably not going to take it into consideration of changing into someone to please someone elsei realise alot recently...firstly, that to never ever judge too fast about a personi just met someone, much older than i amthought he is probably someone who's looking for more than just a friendbut he turned out to be brotherly than anything elseand age isn't a true gauging factor about whether or not you can mingle well with one personsecondly, i think i am not who i used to bejust when you think you will nv ever do certain things,i did itjust when you think you will nv say certain things,i said iti need to find myselfthirdly, i think i am not happy againi don't know when it started, but it didi am becoming more moodyi am very difficult to pleasei can only please myselfno one can really please me till i allow them to do sofourth, i don't know how to fall in love anymoredon't know if i am jadedi don't know who is real and fakei don't know who i wanti get disgusted with people very easilyi judge people with a more stringent eyes nowadays
going going gone 5:31 AM;
Monday, October 23, 2006
tell me where i shld go from here....i dunno anymore.....hold me...hug me...kiss me...where are u?
going going gone 10:37 PM;
some pictures i finally managed to get and now i finally collaged them!finally indeed...heh...thanks to the contirbutorS!love ya alll....hugs...
these are the pics that are taken when Sugih my dear indo friend pop by in singapore..missed those days in secondary sch man... it was sooo fun...well i still think going out with them is fun...hehh....and i had a candy floss session with all of them in NEW YORK NEW YORK...yumsss...
and these are the pics taken in Zouk ..with my dear friends...june, alvi,jason,alex, and Johnny boy...=)
*i feel horrible at times.. i feel i am soo badly mistaken by people...and this makes me really sad..esp when i think i have put in so much effort to something.. i had to let go cos i feel that people often mistake my intentions...sigh..well...i just have to let go and seem non-chalant abt it...well infact i feel i horrible...cos i feel everything is slowin down...and i feel that things ain't managed the way it's supposed to...maybe i shld go into the "hermit" mode...i am so often left out...and it sucks totally...and i am trying too hard to please everyone..and i feel that people don't treat me nice just becos they like me...they treat me nice out of their own convenience...and for their own good...and sometimes i feel like a sucker..i don't know why i have to succumb to these shit...it just feel like no one cares...i do not know what i want now...i do not know what is going to happen next...i am moving with the currents..hoping for something good to happen...i do not know why i chose this path that i am taking now...be it good or bad.. i shall accept it..cos i chose it...i am going to make the best outta it...emptiness is how i feel..hope i will get out of this shitty emotion soon...and try to enjoy everything and anything that comes along....*
going going gone 8:16 PM;
Saturday, October 14, 2006
there's this void in me..i think this emptiness has been there for a very long time...i can't seem to fill it up at all...the need to contain it is so overwhelming...i could have rub off some of this void onto other people...maybe i shld learn to accept that this emptiness is only a norm and will perhaps stay for a really long time...i've been trying..maybe i haven't really tried hard enough to rid this feeling in me...just like this booth..i'm standing next to it..waiting and waiting for the call..THE CALL...but...everytime as the anticipation reaches a new level, i am left disappointed with a prank call...the jaded feeling gets worst...what's worst is when THE CALL seems like THE CALL....but it isn't...the "shittiness" is at its nervana stage la....goshhh....yesterday i was at Zouk..i noticed one particular person...he is very young..and he has this very optimistic way of handling things...from the everything he says and reacts to...i think this person will go very far in life...maybe i should be like him...u can't please everyone in this world...but don't u think it's such a contradiction?if u don't please them...u make them feel bad...and end up u will be the one who is sad...pleasing the world makes u feel bad...not pleasing the world makes u feel bad as well...sooo what shld i do?i really do not know...but to take one step at a time...and react accordingly...anyway just now i was at Borders and i bought a book...yes... a BOOK!!!!! finally i am going to start the reading habit..don't know whether how successful this habit will nurture...haha....the title is called THE SHROUD OF THE THWACKERS...funny the title it may sound...but i think it's a pretty interesting book.. i love the cover esp...=))))) hope i will and can and be able to finish off this book...hahahaaaa.................
going going gone 8:15 PM;
Friday, October 13, 2006
this is an update filled with post dated pictures....well better late than nv...=))) these are some of the pictures taken at the chalet batch 878 organised for like 5-6 batches of SIA trainees...good effort...not feasible...but oh well..turned out pretty alright after all...hehh....
jasmine and i at it again...this picture is dedicated to our dear friend Jaswant...ahhaa...it just irks the helleva him when we do the cutesy stufff....now our dear friend Joshua monkey-ing around...
the japanese girls and us...so u wanna noe them? treat me better ahhh....
jasmine and myself
my fave fruit...eww....yucks....
ayu and myself looking like a fool
myself.geraldine.gladys.huimin.celest
the handsome model...
today i went to Vivo City with my mum to explore....it's reallllllyyy huge.....and there's lotsa shops....good fashion shops...but well they are not that cheap la....haha but oh well...window shopping is quite fun with mummy tooo....hehh...anyway i was strolling in Toys'R'us and i chance upon the board game section...woohoo......and look wat i found....
The Boggle game...i enjoy playing this game....but it's very stressful esp playing with people with super wide vocabs...hahaa....and this game brings back sweet memories..
this is one of my favouritest games of all.. i can sit all day playing themmm...well the Toys'R'us peps displayed them together....hehhh....
going going gone 7:12 PM;
Sunday, October 08, 2006
going going gone 1:41 AM;
Saturday, October 07, 2006
anyway yesterday i went for an Samsung event at Raffles City...it was very cool...very nice...free booze and food...hahaa...Cheapo i am...well it was really nice...seeing beautiful rich people walking ard...haha...and we took a pic with a damn good looking model..have yet to grab that pic from Claire..i will soon...heh...here are some of the pics taken at the party...anyway i found out something damn interesting...that Aldrin (zouk) was a former SIA steward...wow....there are really quite alot of cabin crews around...some of the pics from last night...
weijie.gerald.geraldine.claire.cillia
cillia.gerald.geraldine
claire.cillia.geraldine
and look at what i found in my goodie bag...a picture of beatrice chia...a Zouk Cd (with Aldrin in it..)and a tee (i think designed by the Flesh Imp people)
anyway i accomplished alot today...alot....i woke up early and i went to the Dental clinc in town...met up with Don for lunch and coffeee..and some shopping...managed to help him choose a nice necklace to match his pendent pressie from his friend...he was complaining all day that he look soo sloppy ...cos i tricked him into dressing sloppy...and apparently my sloppy standards are higher than his..so i looked much better than him...hahaa....wateva....after some shopping we decided to go to the National Museum to take a look at the Cartier exhibition...it was a damnnn good exhibition la....the displays were wonderful... and the history to each piece of jewelry...impressive...Louis Cartier is a GENIUS...i think his mystery clock is like one of the finest ...imagine looking at a clock..and u can't see the inside working mechanism at alll....plus that tiniest watch designed for Princess Elizabeth the current Queen Elizabeth...soo nice...it's soooo beautiful...anyway after the Museum trip..i met up with my dearest JOOOOOO for another round of shopping...shopping and mroe shopping...haha...den dinner....den more shoopppinggggg....what a day eh...haaaa.....
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i often complaint about some people being too commitment phobic..
but i did not realise that i am one person who is afraid of commitments as well
but in various aspect of my life...
maybe not so much for lovelife
but more so in my social life..
i do not like to be stifled in anything i do
i like free and easy
going going gone 11:55 PM;
Thursday, October 05, 2006
i am depressed...well ..for many reasons...i am getting sick from what i am doing and the state i am put through..all the time...maybe getting into this job isn't a bad thing..it is good cos u can get out of the country and enjoy some moments of peace and get out of some chaos...and take sometime to reflect about some stuff...yesterday while i was having dinner with my batchmates/colleagues, one of them wanted to pray for us...so he was telling me what God wants him to tell me..HE said i need to take less advices from people around me...and living my life dependent on those advices..those people who offer may not have the best advices ..because they themselves can't solve problems like that...another issue HE said..was that i need to accept the FACT that NO ONE IS PERFECT...i think mayb this is the fact that i expect alot from people...expecting people to meet certain standards i have in a way set...i felt what my colleague said was soo true...and HE also spoke about my family...when i did not discuss anything with them about my family at all..this is sooo miraculous...i am amazed...still amazed...i will take those advices from HIM though..those are the things i often missed out...
there's soo many things i want to do to my life... i wish i can achieve them one day...
when reality sets in
emotion boils
it's getting harder each day
the need to stand firm on the ground grows
without strength, i might just topple over anytime
the mask i wear becomes more different from my real self everyday
traumatizing
going going gone 11:28 PM;
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
the thought of absence is upsetting
i remembered little things about you
cos i knew so little about you
but those little things i know and felt
left such deep impressions
i can't help but think of you again and again
and as those thoughts run through my head
tears streamed down my cheeks again
i wish emotions can be controlled easily
i had to refrain myself from thinking about you
just so that i can see you
and a free KTV session...
going going gone 11:56 PM;
Monday, October 02, 2006
going going gone 11:17 PM;
going going gone 11:12 PM;
going going gone 11:06 PM;
just when i thought there was a glimmer of hope...
it was all dashed...nv would i thought i could like someone like you..
maybe like what u said...infatuation...i just hope it is...and it will soon fade off
u're the sweetest thing that ever happened to me this year
although it did not end the way i wanted..but at least u will still be there..
u could not understand why i am sad...
closure...that's the thing
it has finally ended with a good enough reason...
but it had ended..i don't want it to end..although i knew it was wrong right from the start
i was ready for all the challenges that i probably will face
maybe it was all good...just that i cannot sense it at this point of time...
when the heart overcomes the mind
but i am really glad that our paths once crossed...
wonder will it ever cross again...
you said it is probably impossible...but u are not GOD
how would you know?
the moment i got out of the car...tears streamed down my cheeks...
i thought i would not feel that bad...but it did hurt
it was painful to accept the truth
the state of self denial was really nice...
because it did not hurt....and it gave me hope...but it set expectations
i hope i never have to go thru this ever again...
i never regretted anything that happened
going going gone 8:36 PM;
